I have seen an influx in a particular disease. It appears as though this particular disease is spreading faster than HIV and bitchassness put together( ok maybe not faster than bitchassness). What is this horrid disease, you ask. It is a new affliction known as "Stan-ism."

Stan-ism occurs when the infected decides to consistently stalk, call, follow, tweet, facebook etc. a person who has not only ignored them completely, but made it perfectly clear that they don't want to be bothered. Know let me be clear, I am not talking about fanatical admiration. Fuckkerihilson IS the SHYT, mind you. I mean the type of Stan-ism that causes one to call a person over and over and over again when they haven't responded in any way.Why wouldn't you get the damn hint. If you blow up someones phone and you haven't had a fight with or any real interaction at all with that person, good or bad, why not stop calling. Clearly, they are just not that into you. Oh, and I can promise, the victim of the Stan-ism , is playing all of your voice mails and forwarding all of your texts,tweets,facebook messages to/for all of their friends. You look like a damn fool. Stop now. Save yourself. No one can do it for you. The only cure is a cold turkey cut-off. That's the only way.

I hope this post is helpful to some sad Stan out there. I enjoy being helpful. If you find yourself too weak to go on as you implement your cold-turkey cut off, feel free to email me or leave a comment. I will play some of my old "Stan" mail from my last disaster of a relationship so you see just how big of a fool you are making of yourself. I got some good ones too. Hundreds of them. I doubt that anyone can bear to hear themselves sounding that stupid and pathetic once you've listened to what I have on MY voicemail. Plus I will help you visualize all of the friends and coworkers sitting up listening to you sound like a blubbering idiot as they huddle around laughing at your stupid ass... Whew, you will shake that Stan right off, real quick, promise. That should be all the intervention one should ever need.

Nik

Just let go, dayum.

Its interesting that this fell into MY lap the other day, but if I'm going to stick to my concrete rule that no one and nothing are above getting blogged about then I must speak on this one.
So I got a homegirl out in California. She has an ex that we affectionately refer to as Psycho
Kitty. THIS... CHICK... IS... CRAZY. Just since I've known of this girl (which has not been that long) she has done so much extra ish that even I can't keep up. The bottom line is this. When a mofo doesn't want to f*ck with you anymore, then they don't want to f*ck with you anymore! Why is it necessary to send threatening text messages (I would recommend saving every single one of them)? Why start shit in a club, especially when that just leaves a million witnesses to your psychosis? Why is necessary for the new jump off to interject their 1.5 cents into the situation, when you have no idea who they are or where they come from? Wait, I do know the answer to that one. It's because New Boo has heard "all about how evil, horrible, and terrible you are, yet you have heard nothing about them. Actually, New Boo is probably sick and fucking tired of hearing about you, but oh well. I find that one pretty damn funny actually, but I digress. Anyways, what's the logic behind all the crazy ex stalker sh*t? Is it some unwritten rule that one person must go nuts during breakup? I must interject my disclaimer here, and get used to hearing this one: This foolishness is not exclusive to the family, it's just so amplified because our circle is so much smaller and concentrated. For straight people there are six degrees of separation from one person to the next. With us, there's only three degrees. Basically, we live in a fishbowl. Not only are we (the community) all watching each other, the straight world is watching us too. Everything is magnified to the inth freaking degree. We make ourselves look stupid. So allow me to issue this public service announcement: Ex's, please learn to let go. Move on, and be very careful what you send in a text message. Ex's new piece, understand that in the grander scheme of things, you don't even exist. I mean it's sad, but so very true. Can everyone just grow up? Everything ain't for everybody and you can't always deal with people just because you pity them. If a mofo was crazy with one, chances are they'll be crazy with you. Oh and to my homegirl out in the Bay that made me think about all this, that bitch sounds like she might need to be commited. Hide your kitchen knives...