Whats the deal with Lezzies adn threesomes? YUK and HELL NO

For some reason or another, all of my younger Lesbian friends always want to come to me for advice. I find that quit hilarious, considering how good I am at NOT keeping a girlfriend. However, they seem to think I have all the answers because I've been there, done that. I disagree, but if they ask, i'm telling. One recurring theme that I get hit with by the babies (that's what I call all of them).

THREESOMES


*sigh*



I don't get it. I just do NOT get it.  Look, I like sex just as much as the next person. But I'm a relationship girl. And you're telling me I'm supposed to be 100 with having another bitch touching, kissing, and *gasp* f*cking MY girlfriend...while I watch (or partake, or however that sh*t goes).  I'm supposed to enjoy this sh*t? Because I'm a  lesbian? You're telling me I'm NOT supposed to rip this hoe's throat out? I'm NOT supposed to close your eye permanently for even suggesting such a thing? Because I'm a lesbian... Really. Uh, hell no.
Now this is not to say that I haven't done it before. But it was outside of the context of a relationship. My babies always call and ask about having one with their girlfriend dujour (that's girlfriend of the moment for you, uh, yeah). This tells me a couple of things. 1: I am in the minority as a relationship lesbian, and 2: these b*tches out here got the game ALL WRONG.


Once upon a time I offered to "get" a certain girl for my girlfriend at the time as a gift to her for throwing me such an awesome birthday party. Mind you, I was also so drunk at said party that I was asleep before they cut MY birthday cake. That tells you the state of f*cked-up-ness one must be in to get that ish past me. Needless to say, it didn't happen.


Anywhoo, I really wanna know what the thrill is. In straight relationships a threesome is like the big unspoken fantasy of the boyfriend. Its the elephant in the room. You know he's thinking it, You KNOW he wants it. You also know that, in most cases, he has more sense than to even bring it up. But with lesbians its like a given, almost expected. Whenever the issue comes up with the babies I give the truth according to Star and it goes a little something like this:
DON'T DO  IT (especially if you plan on having any type of long term relationship with this girl)
DON'T DO IT (especially if she's a femme and offered it, cuz chances are she's offered it up plenty of times before
DON'T DO IT (especially if your her first, cuz her and the third party are gonna be boning on your down time)
But since you're gonna do it any way, remember this. 
BE SAFE BE SAFE BE SAFE (that's always rule number one)
DO NOT LET IT GO DOWN AT YOU HOME (cuz you will never look at you comfy bed the same again)
and most importantly
BE THE GUEST STAR ( let that one marinate for a minute, it'll come to ya)


Hope that helps someone out there, Cuz i think my babies are just too far gone for salvation. Oh well.




*Star*