Who you think you gamin'?

Yesterday morning I was in the car listening to a very popular radio show hosted by a comedian who used to have the most spray painted sharpest hairline in the world, but who is now completely bald. They have a segment where they read letters from callers about their relationship woes and ask the host for advice. I'm not sure why having a morning talk show qualifies someone who just went through a nasty divorce as a relationship counselor, but I digress.
This particular letter was from a lady who had recently lost her husband of 20 years. The couple married when she was 18. They have two grown sons and had a very happy life together. The husbands "dying wish" was that she not be with another man. Ever. She is 39. 
Her question to the host was this: She is still a lively, beautiful woman. She wants to, eventually, get out and try to meet someone new. To not be alone for the rest of her life. What she came up with, in order to stay in line with her husband's "wishes,"  was to maybe go out and date...a woman.
Oooh Lawd. Where to begin. 
There are so many things wrong with this one I dont even know where to start. I was cracking up listening to this mess. Luckily, the good host (who i'm sure you know, is a no nonsense type of dude) said everything I was thinking and then some.
This lady has wanted a woman for a while now and that little selfish ass request her husband made was all she needed. As a wife and mother, she fulfilled all the conditions of marriage. Even in the eyes of Christianity, you are done. "Till death do us part." That's it. Period. You are officially free to see whomever you wish. Your husband can't add an amendment to the contract after it's been signed for 20 years. However, you have this little lezzie bell going off in your head like a damn bullhorn and here's your "opportunity" to dip in and not feel like its your fault. Cuz it would be the worst thing ever to pursue what you feel and just admit you want to taste the rainbow.
 I was so glad the host went in on her a*s.
Good day ma'am. You gets no sympathy here. I got your tea, ice and your cup boo. I can't even give you the side eye. For this one I have to give you the coveted Fool Saddown gift basket with the Chile Please body butter and the We Don't Believe You, You Need More People facial scrub. (all courtesy of Awesomelyluvvie.com)

Sneaky Sh*t comes in all forms...

*Star*