Im going to try and do this from just My memory and in order. Don't shoot me if I mess it up.
Aries: Sensitive and Stubborn, but fiercely Loyal. Very sexual. If you get one to actulluy fall in love with you AND be faithful to you. You are officially the bomb.com
Taurus: Similar to Aries. BEYOND stubborn.Fighters, not quite as sexual, but lots of fun.
Gemini: Two sided, but not necessarily two faced. Just watch your back and pick your battles wisely. You're only one person, but you're fighting two.
Cancer: Super sensitive, Super loyal, very determined
Leo: Ummm, no thanks
Virgo: *Clears throat* RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!
Libra: Cool
Scorpio: Cool
Sagitarius: Together and driven. Family oriented. Lots of fun. Great in bed/on the island in the kitchen/in the car...
Capricorn: I've never met one that was ever wrong about anything...in their own heads.
Aquarius: Cool, most of the time. (but that could be said about anyone)
Pisces: Without a doubt the most unbelieveably amazing lovers. Without a doubt, the least compassionate people.
*Star*
Showing posts with label FIGURE IT OUT.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label FIGURE IT OUT.. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Turned out...
How in the hell do you get turned gay? Its not like being turned into a crack head. There is no chemical process that occurs to you cellular makeup once you have a homosexual encounter. Its not like heroin, where your hooked after the first hit. I mean, I totally understand that there are some sick twisted mf's in this world who prey on the young and the weak. I understand that sometimes habits are hard to break. What I don't understand is if you're a full grown adult, who may have been abused or molested and you DID NOT like it, why, as an adult would you continue? Humans are creatures of habit. Habits are made to be broken. If you cant break them on your own, there are places you can go for help...If you want it.
I'm not gay because I was abused sexually by a woman as a child. I am simply not attracted to men. No biggie. However, I just can't buy into the whole, "I was molested as a child and that made me gay and now (15-20yrs later, no less) I know better and do better."
Umm, sorry but wedontbelieveyouyouneedmorepeople.
Get outta here.
This "turning out pehenomenon is especially prevalent in the black community. If I here one more case of " I went to chuuch and now I'm not gay no mo' imma scream.
*sidenote* Before ya'll jump on me, yes I believe God answers prayers and whatever your genuine prayer is, I know he can do it. However, I think being gay is akin to having curly hair or dark skin. So unless the good Lord is running around making b*tches look like Beyonce every time they ask, I just don't think he's gonna being changing sexuality each and every time you ask.
Anyhoo... It just seems to me as though the easiest cop out is to say that someone, usually a close friend or family member did something to you to make you want to taste the rainbow. That way you don't have to say that you actually are attracted to the opposite sex.
I do believe that Turning Out is more believable when it comes to men than women. Lesbian sexual practices are generally the same as what would occur physically between a man and a woman. With men, its a different ballgame. A male and female are not normally partaking in the, ahem, options that are available between two dudes. Once men are exposed to something that feels good, they go to ri-damn-diculous lengths to recreate and maintain that feeling. This is where you get the down low brotha's from, but that's an entirely different blog.
For Lesbians (especially "studs") its like some dumb a*s right of passage to be running around "turning out" straight chicks. Let me tell ya'll something, bi-curiosity is as big an epidemic as bitchassness. Its just less feared. Since it's the cool thing now to be gay, there's a young dumb college freshmen just waiting on some manly upperclassmen to come bust her down on the late night tip then parade her around campus as her new piece. Its a win -win situation for both of you dummies. Not a good look to the real world , but I digress.
Let me put on my Westwood hat right quicl and wrap this thing up.
Gay is not fun in America. Its not easy at all. However for some of us, its real life. Please stop fronting, faking and acting like the fact that you want go in (yeah, go in) is err'body else's damn fault. If you grown, ain't nobody holding a 9mm to ya head making you sneak over to your homegirl's house, late nite, trying to get her outta her underwear. Stop Playing... Ya'll gettin on my nerves.
*StAR*
I'm not gay because I was abused sexually by a woman as a child. I am simply not attracted to men. No biggie. However, I just can't buy into the whole, "I was molested as a child and that made me gay and now (15-20yrs later, no less) I know better and do better."
Umm, sorry but wedontbelieveyouyouneedmorepeople.
Get outta here.
This "turning out pehenomenon is especially prevalent in the black community. If I here one more case of " I went to chuuch and now I'm not gay no mo' imma scream.
*sidenote* Before ya'll jump on me, yes I believe God answers prayers and whatever your genuine prayer is, I know he can do it. However, I think being gay is akin to having curly hair or dark skin. So unless the good Lord is running around making b*tches look like Beyonce every time they ask, I just don't think he's gonna being changing sexuality each and every time you ask.
Anyhoo... It just seems to me as though the easiest cop out is to say that someone, usually a close friend or family member did something to you to make you want to taste the rainbow. That way you don't have to say that you actually are attracted to the opposite sex.
I do believe that Turning Out is more believable when it comes to men than women. Lesbian sexual practices are generally the same as what would occur physically between a man and a woman. With men, its a different ballgame. A male and female are not normally partaking in the, ahem, options that are available between two dudes. Once men are exposed to something that feels good, they go to ri-damn-diculous lengths to recreate and maintain that feeling. This is where you get the down low brotha's from, but that's an entirely different blog.
For Lesbians (especially "studs") its like some dumb a*s right of passage to be running around "turning out" straight chicks. Let me tell ya'll something, bi-curiosity is as big an epidemic as bitchassness. Its just less feared. Since it's the cool thing now to be gay, there's a young dumb college freshmen just waiting on some manly upperclassmen to come bust her down on the late night tip then parade her around campus as her new piece. Its a win -win situation for both of you dummies. Not a good look to the real world , but I digress.
Let me put on my Westwood hat right quicl and wrap this thing up.
Gay is not fun in America. Its not easy at all. However for some of us, its real life. Please stop fronting, faking and acting like the fact that you want go in (yeah, go in) is err'body else's damn fault. If you grown, ain't nobody holding a 9mm to ya head making you sneak over to your homegirl's house, late nite, trying to get her outta her underwear. Stop Playing... Ya'll gettin on my nerves.
*StAR*
Labels:
FIGURE IT OUT.
Friday, July 3, 2009
This may be a little heavy for ya'll,but it's so true.
Found at BET.com
"Black people are equal now, and gay people aren't," Emil Wilbekin, a black gay man and editor of Giant magazine, told the Associated Press recently.
Keith Boykin If only it were that simple. But it's not. Black people still aren't equal and neither are gays. It doesn't help the gay rights cause to exaggerate the success of the black struggle or to diminish the success of the LGBT movement.
But in the weeks since Proposition 8 passed in California, much of the conversation that has taken place has moved from the simplistic to the ridiculous, including the argument blaming the small minority of blacks in the state for killing gay marriage. Fortunately, two of the smartest responses have come from African American columnists Clarence Page and Charles Blow.
What Went Wrong In California?
Page responds to an article in the Dec. 16 issue of The Advocate, a gay magazine, that boldly declares: "Gay is the New Black." Not quite, says Page. Instead, "gay is the new gray," he argues.
As a columnist for the Chicago Tribune, Page supports same-sex marriage, but he's not too impressed about the comparisons that some gay rights advocates have made between the LGBT struggle and the fight for racial equality.
Gay rights leaders are "tragically correct," he says, to point out the hate crimes perpetrated against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people. "But the history and nature" of the two struggles "is so different as to serve to alienate potential allies instead of winning them over," he writes.
New York Times columnist Charles Blow is equally helpful in his recent opinion piece about same-sex marriage. Noting the significantly higher number of black women than black men who voted in California, Blow argues against the strategy of using interracial marriage as a point of similarity to gay marriage in trying to win over black women.
"Marriage can be a sore subject for black women in general," he writes. Citing 2007 Census Bureau data, Blow says "black women are the least likely of all women to be married and the most likely to be divorced. Women who can't find a man to marry might not be thrilled about the idea of men marrying each other."
I disagree with Blow's analysis about black women in relation to men on the down low, but he is exactly right about comparing interracial marriage to same-sex marriage. That's a non-starter for many black women and not an effective argument to win them over.
Are Blacks More Homophobic?
Whenever we talk about race, it's important to remember that the black community is not monolithic and sometimes paradoxical. Although blacks tend to be socially conservative, we are also politically progressive.
Despite black opposition to same-sex marriage, when you look at other LGBT issues (that don't concern marriage, sex or relationships), blacks are as likely -- and in some cases more likely -- to support pro-gay policies than whites are. Polls on employment discrimination, gays in the military, gay housing discrimination, and even the gay adoption ban passed in Arkansas last month indicate that blacks have actually been more supportive of gay rights than whites on these issues.
And blacks have repeatedly elected and re-elected gay supportive politicians. It's not just the black mayors across the country, but also the members of the Congressional Black Caucus, who form the most supportive demographic voting bloc for gay rights issues in the Congress, except for the gay caucus itself. And that's not to mention the nation's only two black governors, both of whom support same-sex marriage.
The issue is not whether blacks are homophobic or not. Of course we are. We all live in the same racist, sexist, classist, misogynist, homophobic, heterosexist, culturally imperialistic society. Everyone is affected by those prejudices at some level. The question, though, is whether blacks are more homophobic than others, and that depends, of course, on how you measure homophobia.
On the personal level for many black gays and lesbians, the black community certainly feels more homophobic for those who face the slings and arrows of insult from their friends, family, church members and co-workers. But on a political level, it's hard to prove that blacks are any more homophobic than whites.
Even back in the 1990s, when I wrote my first book, polls showed blacks were more supportive than whites of outlawing employment discrimination against gays, but blacks were still far less supportive of same-sex marriage than whites. How do you explain that?
A New Strategy For Same-Sex Marriage Supporters
Many critics of black homophobia fail to grasp the difference between the politically progressive and the socially conservative streaks in the African American community. To communicate effectively to blacks, you need to know how to frame these issues.
If you can figure out how to frame the gay question as a political issue for basic rights instead of a social issue about acceptance, then blacks are much more likely to support it. That's a hard sell for same-sex marriage because many blacks see marriage as a religious structure, not a civil institution. But it creates opportunities to learn effective messaging.
It's important to remember the messenger is just as important as the message. Straight black people are not likely to sympathize with white people preaching to them about the evils of gay discrimination. That's a message that can most effectively be delivered by other blacks, straight and gay. Until the white LGBT movement learns this obvious point and implements strategies to include many more LGBT people of color in positions of visibility and responsibility, they are doomed to repeat the same tragic mistakes of their past failures.
It's also not helpful for gays to equate one movement with another. The civil rights movement is not the same as the gay rights movement, racism is not the same as homophobia and blacks are not the same as gays.
Although there are similarities between the two movements, there are also major differences. But why do gay activists feel the need to prove the struggles are the same in the first place?
America doesn't ask women, Jews, people with disabilities or immigrants to prove that their discrimination is identical to black suffering, and yet no one denies that sexism, anti-Semitism, ablism and xenophobia exist in our society. So why should gays and lesbians need to prove that their suffering is identical to black suffering in order to be treated equally under the law? That doesn't make much sense, but we're not talking logic here; we're talking prejudice.
Gay activists are also deceiving themselves if they think they can change public opinion simply by proving that homosexuality is not a choice. Blackness is not a choice either, and that hasn't stopped prejudice against African Americans.
Sure, we can easily blame black homophobia on religion, but it's not that simple either. The black church is a paradox. It is the most homophobic institution in the black community and at the same time the most homo-tolerant. Just scan the gay members of the choir the next time the pastor wanders off into one of his fire and brimstone sermons about homosexuality and you'll understand. We have a "don't ask, don't tell" policy about homosexuality in the church.
We have the same policy in parts of the black community. That's why we often downplay the LGBT identities of many of our black heroes and sheroes. And yet who could imagine black culture without James Baldwin, Lorraine Hansberry, Alvin Ailey, Angela Davis, Billy Strayhorn, Barbara Jordan or the Rev. James Cleveland?
Yes you can argue until you're blue in the face that not all blacks are straight and not all gays are white. Yes you can prove that homosexuality is not a "white thing" invented by Europeans and you can show that it existed in pre-colonial Africa. Yes you can refute the simplistic argument that "gays did not have to sit at the back of the bus as blacks did" by simply pointing to black gays and lesbians who endured segregation with their straight counterparts. And yes you can remind people that Dr. Martin Luther King's closest political adviser, Bayard Rustin, was a black gay man, and he helped to organize the 1955-56 Montgomery bus boycott.
Some people will get it; some won't. But why should you have to prove all of this simply to win the "right" to be treated equally? Who cares if gay is the new black? In the end, it doesn't and shouldn't matter.
It doesn't matter which group was first oppressed, or which is most oppressed, or whether they are identically oppressed. What matters is that no group of people should be oppressed. As long as various groups continue to focus on the hierarchy of oppression, they will validate the hierarchy and minimize the oppression
"Black people are equal now, and gay people aren't," Emil Wilbekin, a black gay man and editor of Giant magazine, told the Associated Press recently.
Keith Boykin If only it were that simple. But it's not. Black people still aren't equal and neither are gays. It doesn't help the gay rights cause to exaggerate the success of the black struggle or to diminish the success of the LGBT movement.
But in the weeks since Proposition 8 passed in California, much of the conversation that has taken place has moved from the simplistic to the ridiculous, including the argument blaming the small minority of blacks in the state for killing gay marriage. Fortunately, two of the smartest responses have come from African American columnists Clarence Page and Charles Blow.
What Went Wrong In California?
Page responds to an article in the Dec. 16 issue of The Advocate, a gay magazine, that boldly declares: "Gay is the New Black." Not quite, says Page. Instead, "gay is the new gray," he argues.
As a columnist for the Chicago Tribune, Page supports same-sex marriage, but he's not too impressed about the comparisons that some gay rights advocates have made between the LGBT struggle and the fight for racial equality.
Gay rights leaders are "tragically correct," he says, to point out the hate crimes perpetrated against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people. "But the history and nature" of the two struggles "is so different as to serve to alienate potential allies instead of winning them over," he writes.
New York Times columnist Charles Blow is equally helpful in his recent opinion piece about same-sex marriage. Noting the significantly higher number of black women than black men who voted in California, Blow argues against the strategy of using interracial marriage as a point of similarity to gay marriage in trying to win over black women.
"Marriage can be a sore subject for black women in general," he writes. Citing 2007 Census Bureau data, Blow says "black women are the least likely of all women to be married and the most likely to be divorced. Women who can't find a man to marry might not be thrilled about the idea of men marrying each other."
I disagree with Blow's analysis about black women in relation to men on the down low, but he is exactly right about comparing interracial marriage to same-sex marriage. That's a non-starter for many black women and not an effective argument to win them over.
Are Blacks More Homophobic?
Whenever we talk about race, it's important to remember that the black community is not monolithic and sometimes paradoxical. Although blacks tend to be socially conservative, we are also politically progressive.
Despite black opposition to same-sex marriage, when you look at other LGBT issues (that don't concern marriage, sex or relationships), blacks are as likely -- and in some cases more likely -- to support pro-gay policies than whites are. Polls on employment discrimination, gays in the military, gay housing discrimination, and even the gay adoption ban passed in Arkansas last month indicate that blacks have actually been more supportive of gay rights than whites on these issues.
And blacks have repeatedly elected and re-elected gay supportive politicians. It's not just the black mayors across the country, but also the members of the Congressional Black Caucus, who form the most supportive demographic voting bloc for gay rights issues in the Congress, except for the gay caucus itself. And that's not to mention the nation's only two black governors, both of whom support same-sex marriage.
The issue is not whether blacks are homophobic or not. Of course we are. We all live in the same racist, sexist, classist, misogynist, homophobic, heterosexist, culturally imperialistic society. Everyone is affected by those prejudices at some level. The question, though, is whether blacks are more homophobic than others, and that depends, of course, on how you measure homophobia.
On the personal level for many black gays and lesbians, the black community certainly feels more homophobic for those who face the slings and arrows of insult from their friends, family, church members and co-workers. But on a political level, it's hard to prove that blacks are any more homophobic than whites.
Even back in the 1990s, when I wrote my first book, polls showed blacks were more supportive than whites of outlawing employment discrimination against gays, but blacks were still far less supportive of same-sex marriage than whites. How do you explain that?
A New Strategy For Same-Sex Marriage Supporters
Many critics of black homophobia fail to grasp the difference between the politically progressive and the socially conservative streaks in the African American community. To communicate effectively to blacks, you need to know how to frame these issues.
If you can figure out how to frame the gay question as a political issue for basic rights instead of a social issue about acceptance, then blacks are much more likely to support it. That's a hard sell for same-sex marriage because many blacks see marriage as a religious structure, not a civil institution. But it creates opportunities to learn effective messaging.
It's important to remember the messenger is just as important as the message. Straight black people are not likely to sympathize with white people preaching to them about the evils of gay discrimination. That's a message that can most effectively be delivered by other blacks, straight and gay. Until the white LGBT movement learns this obvious point and implements strategies to include many more LGBT people of color in positions of visibility and responsibility, they are doomed to repeat the same tragic mistakes of their past failures.
It's also not helpful for gays to equate one movement with another. The civil rights movement is not the same as the gay rights movement, racism is not the same as homophobia and blacks are not the same as gays.
Although there are similarities between the two movements, there are also major differences. But why do gay activists feel the need to prove the struggles are the same in the first place?
America doesn't ask women, Jews, people with disabilities or immigrants to prove that their discrimination is identical to black suffering, and yet no one denies that sexism, anti-Semitism, ablism and xenophobia exist in our society. So why should gays and lesbians need to prove that their suffering is identical to black suffering in order to be treated equally under the law? That doesn't make much sense, but we're not talking logic here; we're talking prejudice.
Gay activists are also deceiving themselves if they think they can change public opinion simply by proving that homosexuality is not a choice. Blackness is not a choice either, and that hasn't stopped prejudice against African Americans.
Sure, we can easily blame black homophobia on religion, but it's not that simple either. The black church is a paradox. It is the most homophobic institution in the black community and at the same time the most homo-tolerant. Just scan the gay members of the choir the next time the pastor wanders off into one of his fire and brimstone sermons about homosexuality and you'll understand. We have a "don't ask, don't tell" policy about homosexuality in the church.
We have the same policy in parts of the black community. That's why we often downplay the LGBT identities of many of our black heroes and sheroes. And yet who could imagine black culture without James Baldwin, Lorraine Hansberry, Alvin Ailey, Angela Davis, Billy Strayhorn, Barbara Jordan or the Rev. James Cleveland?
Yes you can argue until you're blue in the face that not all blacks are straight and not all gays are white. Yes you can prove that homosexuality is not a "white thing" invented by Europeans and you can show that it existed in pre-colonial Africa. Yes you can refute the simplistic argument that "gays did not have to sit at the back of the bus as blacks did" by simply pointing to black gays and lesbians who endured segregation with their straight counterparts. And yes you can remind people that Dr. Martin Luther King's closest political adviser, Bayard Rustin, was a black gay man, and he helped to organize the 1955-56 Montgomery bus boycott.
Some people will get it; some won't. But why should you have to prove all of this simply to win the "right" to be treated equally? Who cares if gay is the new black? In the end, it doesn't and shouldn't matter.
It doesn't matter which group was first oppressed, or which is most oppressed, or whether they are identically oppressed. What matters is that no group of people should be oppressed. As long as various groups continue to focus on the hierarchy of oppression, they will validate the hierarchy and minimize the oppression
Labels:
chuuuuch,
do unto others,
FIGURE IT OUT.,
my people.,
white priveledge
Monday, June 15, 2009
*STAR*


I AM ME
I AM MY OWN WOMAN
I HAVE BEEN TAKING CARE OF MYSELF FOR A LONG TIME
CHANGE IS GOOD
COMPROMISE IS BETTER
COMPROMISE IS BETTER
DONT EXPECT MORE THAN YOU GIVE
I LOVE
IN RETURN, I EXPECT LOVE
MORE IMPORTANTLY, I NEED AND DESERVE LOVE
MY LIFE IS NOT YOUR ENTERTAINMENT
IF I AM ONLY PRIVY TO SOME OF YOURS, YOU WILL ONLY BE WELCOMED INTO PARTS OF MINE
I AM NO ONE' S PUPPET
WHENEVER THE DAY COMES THAT I AM EQUAL, THINGS WILL BE DIFFERENT
MY REACTIONS, MY RESPONSES, MY HAPPINESS AND EVERYONE ELSE'S WILL BE DIFFERENT
UNTIL THEN, EXPECT MORE OF THE SAME
MY PERSONALITY WILL NEVER CHANGE
WITH DISCUSSION AND FAIRNESS, MY PERCEPTIONS MIGHT
OTHERWISE, EXPECT MORE OF THE SAME
I AM FINALLY HAPPY WITH ME
AND BECAUSE OF THAT, I CAN BE HAPPY WITH MY DREAM
BUT ONLY IF IT LEARNS TO LISTEN AS WELL AS AT IT DICTATES
CAN YOU SAY THE SAME?
FALLING STAR
NIK
Labels:
FIGURE IT OUT.
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*SISTAHSTAR*
- SISTAH STAR
- I could rant and rave about me all day. I am one of my favorite subjects. Soon I'll be one of yours too.
COPYWRITTEN, SO DONT COPY ME...
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.


